Samoan Olympic Withdrawal


"The Real Reason Local Samoan Weightlifters Were Pulled From the Tokyo Olympic Games..."

Not long after 20-year-old Ugandan Weightlifter Julius Ssekitoleko was found in Central Japan handing out his CV to local rugby clubs, former Samoan PM / Caretaker Prime Minisiter Tony Tuila'epa Sa'ilele Malielegaoi has stated that, "This is why it is so imbortants that we not send our Weightlifters to Japan!!"

This is contrary to Tony's initial response, "We must protection da afletes from the Covid-Corned Beef strain in Japan ahh!!" when asked why local Samoan Weightlifters were omitted from the Tokyo Games.

When quizzed whether or not financial constraints had influenced his decision Tony said, "No way Hoe-Says, but do you know it how much da flight to Japan from Samoa costs?? Have you seen Freddie Tuilagi's sushi bill?? Now try times dat by a thousands of tala maete..."

A spokesperson for the Uganda Weightlifting Federation, said they were surprised to hear their weightlifter Mr Ssekitoleko had disappeared, given that the athletes, coaches and officials had handed over their passports and that the hotel where they were staying was “well guarded.” 

Tony went on to say that the Ugandan Weightlifter is a prime example as to why we must keep our Samoan Weightlifters locked down in Samoa.

"If you think taking their passport foto book will stop our afletes from overstaying then you haven't heard of the Dawn Raids ahh?! If you look on the Yahoos then you will see it was a very Savage times back in New Zealands full of Deceptikonz and Devolos but I'm glad the governments is now Adeaze you know..." #IYKYK

Tony also stated that Samoa needs their athletes playing rugbys in New Zealand and Aussie first not playing the Olympics.

"If we let them into Japan they will never going to be able to find the Western Union in Tokyo to send me the moneys!!"

More to come...


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